Ever felt stuck in a relationship dance with someone? Frustrated that the other person won’t change their dance steps no matter how hard you try? For example, a teenager that just grunts no matter how hard you try to have a conversation, or do you always feel like you are yelling to communicate with your child because they just won’t listen?
Unfortunately, you don’t have control over how another person moves and which steps they use. However, the good news is you do have control of something – they way YOU move. You have choices – you can take forward steps, side steps or even a shimmy!
Imagine a rope around a group of people dancing, even if everyone is doing the same steps and keeping the same distance, if one person makes a move, the whole rope needs to change – becoming tight in some places, loose in the other, wobbling as the person shakes it. This rope symbolizes how you can change the dances you engage in with others which will ultimately changes how the group is dancing!
So, if you are feeling lost in your dance steps with your child or teen, try changing it up – throw in some old school lawnmower moves (let them decide on dinner tonight – no matter how unhealthy), try a bit of Michael Jackson’s thriller (stop asking ‘how was your day’, instead ask them about the character on the video game they are playing), or even a bit of the Macarena (change up your routine and visit the skate park before school). Keep dancing those different steps until you find your rhythm with your family.